The 2018 World Cup bid, the Daily Mail and Bill Hicks

The late and much lamented Bill Hicks regularly entertained audiences in the early nineties with his impersonations of then US President George Bush. It’s time to repeat one of his most famous quotes.

“We still live in a dangerous world,” Bush (Hicks) would say, before the conscience of the comedian interrupted proceedings.

“Thanks to you,” he would conclude, not so subtly suggesting one of the reasons why there was so much trouble in the world was the practice of selling arms to unstable pariah regimes which could go loopy at any time.

I mention Hicks because the Daily Mail, which released details of a private conversation between Lord Triesman and a former civil servant, during which the peer claimed Spain was preparing to bribe referees at the World Cup with the help of the Russians, today ran an article calling for Seb Coe to save the England bid.

Of course the article reiterated the main accusations from the original article without saying who printed them in the first place.

In its view, Triesman had to go because of his “stunning indiscretions”, “wild allegations” and “wholly destructive comments”, all of which were presented to Daily Mail readers over tea and toast.

Fair enough, the man’s a complete fool for allowing himself to be trapped by someone driven by money and perhaps other darker motives.

But she turned up to have dinner with Triesman after being fitted with a wire by the Daily Mail. So if the paper asks: “Is our World Cup bid damaged beyond repair?”, you could always reply, “Very possibly, thanks to you.”

Beckham in line for World Cup role while doubts grow over Essien

David Beckham will probably travel to South Africa with the England squad for World Cup 2010, it was announced this morning. Everything hinges on a meeting with the surgeon who recently repaired the damage to the player’s torn tendon. The necessary facilities for Beckham’s continued rehabilitation also need to be in place before he can travel.

Teams England face at World Cup should see red, says study

Adding a splash of red to the England goalkeeper’s kit could give the team an advantage during a penalty shoot out. Welcome to the first of what is likely to be a shameless litany of World Cup PR stories claiming tenuous links to the real thing.

Capello on Spain and World Cup 2010

England manager Fabio Capello has revealed his admiration of the way Spain play, which other teams he thinks are a danger in South Africa, and which England player has improved more than anyone else this season.

Kinky sex and World Cup 2010

A weird looking sex doll is being touted as the best way to keep England players away from temptation during the World Cup in South Africa. I'm not so sure...

Blatter takes aim at World Cup doom mongers

Sepp Blatter has called for the media to think positively about the World Cup in South Africa as yet another FIFA event is plagued by questions about security and crime in 2010.

According to worldfootballinsider.com a visibly irritated FIFA President was once again forced to answer questions on a topic he clearly has little time for.

“Please support us by saying let’s go there and trust the South Africans and South Africa,” he said.

“They are ready to organize the game and your security. But 100 percent security you will never find it anywhere in the world.”

Blatter cited the successful Confederations Cup and the country’s staging of rugby and cricket World Cups and other international events as evidence that South African law enforcement organisations can cope.

“There was not one single incident in security [at the Confederations Cup] and still questions are coming ‘what about security’.”

Security isn’t the real point, says worldfootballinsider.com. No-one doubts “there will be high-level security in and around the 10 stadia in nine host cities. The problem lies in ensuring the safety of the 450,000 visitors expected to attend matches.”

Blatter was speaking at the launch of the FIFA World Cup Trophy Tour. The solid-gold trophy will soon embark on its longest ever global tour, visiting 86 countries during a 225-day journey.

This excellent initiative is designed to “allow thousands of fans to enjoy a close-up view of football’s greatest prize.”

What a shame they ruined the idea by getting a well-known fizzy drink company involved.

Their spokesman said “Our programs to support the 2010 FIFA World Cup, such as the Trophy Tour, will leave a lifelong impression on consumers that helps to reinforce loyalty and preference for our business and our brands.”

South Africa to welcome England football fans

Businesses which benefited from the recent Lions tour are now ready to lay out the red carpet for England fans next year, according to the AFP news agency.

The report quotes a businessman and a tourism director who are both looking forward to the atmosphere and the cash generated by followers of Fabio Capello’s team.

Latest estimates say the World Cup is expected to boost the South African economy by 55.7billion Rand (GBP £5b), generate 415,400 jobs and hand the government a 19.3billion Rand (GBP £1.6b) tax bonus.

Nearly 500,000 football tourists are expected to spend 8.5billion Rand during the month-long championship in June and July.

Andre Malan is one of the businessmen hoping some of this cash is spent in his restaurant and bar.

He helped look after 6,000 rugby fans on match day when the touring British and Irish Lions tour took on the Springboks in June.

Now he wants to extend a similar welcome to football fans. “I think everyone says they would definitely want them [England] at their stadium. They've got the largest following of supporters,” said the manager of the Eastwoods Tavern in Pretoria.

Mark Williams, South African tourism director for the United Kingdom and United States, is equally enthusiastic.

“When the Lions tour came to South Africa, there were close to 40,000 Brits or English that came out to South Africa and spent a billion rand."

"So from a football perspective, hopefully it will be a bit more and hopefully they will spend a bit more."

“It's a fantastic atmosphere,” added Andre Malan. “These guys when they come out, they come in large numbers. Obviously beer is high on the priority list for them. They eat a lot and drink a lot.”

South Africa appears ready to give England fans the essentials!

FIFA branded Sony Ericsson W995 handset to give away

Like a disgruntled ex-partner arriving at your home with 14-inch two-handed pruning shears and designs on your thumbs, life can sometimes take you by surprise.

Take this week. One minute I’m writing a 200-word rant on why The Socceroos is a rubbish nickname; the next I’m giving a phone away.

That’s right, some marketing bod contacted me to offer a FIFA branded Sony Ericsson W995 handset to one lucky World Cup Bafana Bafana 2010 visitor.

You could win the phone for FREE by answering this simple question and leaving your name and address in the Comments box below this post:

Excluding penalties, how many goals did England score in the last World Cup finals?

You have until August 23rd to submit your answer and contact details.

The winner will be announced here on August 24th. Good luck!

If you win the phone, enter your details at www.WinTheTickets.co.uk, including the IMEI number, and you will automatically be entered into a prize draw:

Daily Prizes: 1 x Sony BRAVIA TV

Every day a stylish 40-inch Sony BRAVIA TV is up for grabs.

Weekly Prizes: 2 x pairs of tickets to the 2010 FIFA World Cup

Win two pairs of tickets to a 2010 FIFA World Cup match. Flights and three nights in 4-star accommodation are included.

Grand Prize: 1 x 2010 FIFA World Cup Golden Ticket

This golden ticket entitles the winner to a pair of tickets to every game their country plays – including the final. This once in a lifetime prize includes flights and 4-star accommodation.

PS. If anyone from Sony Ericsson is reading this, I’ve got my eye on your X1 and World Cup finals tickets / accommodation. Just thought you might like to know that.