Capello to rely on “ambulance cases”

Earlier this year four England fans entered a FIFA “Follow Your Team” ballot for tickets to every England game and subsequent matches, whether England are still in the tournament or not. Having won a month off watching footy, now they are telling us all about it in The Daily Mail. I’ll keep an eye on what they say just in case they offend anyone. They look like decent lads but you can never be too careful with the Mail.

One Premiership club may have found a way to stoke up antagonism towards US players in advance of next summer’s England – USA World Cup clash: sign Landon Donovan and let opposing fans roundly abuse him for a few months. Sources say the MLS veteran refuses to believe Everton are involved in a relegation dogfight. They don’t do anything as uncivilised as relegation in the States, and Donovan thinks we don’t bother with it here either. Oh dear.

The Daily Maverick describes itself as “a unique blend of news, information, analysis and opinion delivered from our newsroom in Johannesburg, South Africa”. While they probably have a point, I hope this isn’t representative of their attitude to the World Cup as a whole.

Oooops. Mentioning penalty shoot outs yesterday has, it seems, struck a chord with one renowned expert from twelve yards. Matt Le Tissier, scorer of 47 penalties from 48 attempts, has stepped forward to offer his services to any England player afraid of penalties. Hilariously, this report also quotes the ex-Southampton and now Sky pundit as saying “I hated being told what to do when I was a player so I wouldn't like to be lecturing others now”. Glad we cleared that one up.

And “Fabio Capello's World Cup hopes rest with Manchester United's luckless quartet”. I nearly cried with despair when I read this.

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