Why Sepp Blatter wants to stay on at FIFA

An unhinged housekeeper is whispering in Blatter’s ear “Ahh go on, go on, go on, go on,” followed by Blatter as played by Dermot Morgan saying “Mrs Doyle, honestly I couldn’t”, before he is forced to back down as the verbal onslaught continues: “Ahh go on, go on, go on, go on, GO ON!”. “OK,” the old survivor says, “I’ll stay until I’m 90.” I can’t think of any other explanation why Blatter is so determined to stay put.

Obviously some of the papers have also picked up on the story, although they seem less interested in the Father Ted angle.

The Guardian says Blatter’s continued dominance relies on a successful World Cup in South Africa. The cunning old fox is also looking ahead to Brazil in 2014 and new ticketing arrangements which could help tournament organisers avoid the problems which have arisen this time around. I could almost warm to the man for this move alone, if it wasn’t for the fact that he is already fighting the election for FIFA President and this is clearly the first shot in a long campaign.

The Telegraph has Blatter shoring up his position with the backing of UEFA boss Michel Platini. It could all have something to do with a supposed deal to bring the World Cup to Europe in 2018. I could almost warm to the man for this move alone, if it wasn’t for the fact that he is already fighting the election for FIFA President and this is clearly another first shot in a long campaign.

The same paper has a report on a move to fill stadiums during the competition in South Africa. It seems that the category of some tickets will be changed to ensure they are more affordable for South Africans. If Blatter is behind this initiative I could almost warm to the man... well, you know the rest.